DUAL
Art by Bruce Timm
YOU ARE MORE.
More than your fears.
Let it out. If you only cry through tattoo tears, you're holding onto abuse. Afraid to let go because you don't want to seem weak and wounded.
LESS DISCIPLINE MORE LOVE.
Being a Father is heavyweight. We bruise, smother and crush what we cherish. Selfish conquests make ego and violence beautiful.
DONT BELIEVE ME!
Behold the sparking eye and creamy thighs of women who want more after they're satisfied. They prefer danger over comfort and stability. Why do you think they read smut books and question us about porn. They want a threat but don't understand the wreckage that comes with it. We brush off their mental fuckery to make the relationship last for the children. Until the last one is out of the house, then we lose what stopped belonging to us. The love that made us last.
FUUUUCK!
When you're cutting the weight of bad habits like showing whose better instead of how to improve, you'll get sick and feel like such a burden, you won't want to move. They say sensitive men call it depression; tough ones call it going through some shit. Enlighted ones understand, work while fixing it and don't give life and labels to anything that hinders them.
That's a wish I'm trying to live. But the only thing I've ever received from a wish was moment of silence.
No peace because I wish to resurrect dead dreams and relationships that seem better discreet. Ones gone but celebrated through spirits. Seeing shapes in a bottle and hearing their voice with every swallow. Ones longed for through prayer and ones who hold space in the abyss you avoid.
Hold on to the love children see and feel beyond the hostility and noise.
To all the Father's wondering HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?
My Adivice is Just Don't pull Out!
A Quick Word
Image From Boyz N The Hood
My version of your dreams are irrelevant.
But since there is no maturity age for emotions, I will always be hurt and aggravated if you give up on yours.
And.. I love you so much I would sacrifice mine so you could live yours. Not forever though, I am not a broken man, and I don't want to love with a vengeful heart.
I have a distrust for a-lot. Especially feelings. They betray me when I think about how I'm supposed to love and discipline. Sometimes, goddamn, lord forgive me I want to beat you into submission.
Because holy shit you make some bad ass decisions. Then I remember all of mine. Even now when I allow anger to linger for lessons that turn into wars of willpower to see whose anger can last longer, whose pride has more authority.
My sanity, care, empathy, compassion, all thoughts and emotions a father are supposed to have gets drained like an hourglass. Although time never runs out or fast enough on behaviors that limit my patience.
Put me in the psych ward because I love you like crazy.
If that's the one thing you get from my discipline. I did my job as A Man. A Father. A Masculine being that can't be neutered. I'll always demand your best and want you happy. That makes me a real mother fucker from the generation admired for opening doors for their family. Who took care of their children and grands, when a hard life was more than spoiled babies could stand.
Sometimes our home feels like a ward.
Negativity makes us psychic? You know why I ask! We hold each other to task before we act. We hold each other down the way ghetto birds bring joy, and warning signs to escape. They say positivity is the way. I say reality is the escape.
I hold a dealer's pain. Punishing and pushing to provide love and security, so family can one day be saved.
I love you like crazy and for the first time I may allow myself to understand why you behave like that...Me...
Be your own. own what and who you're becoming.
Are you still a virgin? The wrong goods can spoil you for the rest. Mental stimulation is supreme, godly ejaculation. Everyone should have that I don't give a fuck in'em. It's called ambition, real living.
That's the tradition I want you to carry. Never-mind ignorant thinking, from sinners portrayed as saints because they get more attention than a fake orgasm. Make sure you seduce for real connections.
I Love You Like Crazy.
Dad Joke
What did Cinderella say to Prince Charming?“Want to see if it fits?”
Music I'm Enjoying
Greentea Peng (TELL DEM IT'S SUNNY)
Movie I Recommend
Cooley High (1975)
Books
Professional Troublemaker by Luvvie Ajayi Jones
To all the Father's wondering HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
Exposure Therapy
I thought this was ridiculous until I realized we do it every day.
You face the world when you're depressed, and yourself, which is even scarier.
You allow someone to get on your nerves instead of correcting the annoyance. Grow old and bitter in a relationship spoiled from outdated love.
You go to that job every day that makes you wish it would all end sooner than later. Showing up for strategic insubordination and lengthy lunch breaks. Then go home and influence arguments to escape responsibility. That's the response to life of a man who's not really living.
You’ll never avoid disappointment, but you’ll feel less when you confront your fears daily. If you’re getting up, making laziness play its position. Preserving bonds strengthened through love, and kind communication.
It feels like we stay and purposely make the pain worse. Being unproductive feels fulfilling when we have unfulfilled people listening, justifying complaints.
Self-sabotage is a swamp we swim and drown in.
What do you fear most? I bet it has to do with being broke and alone. Feeling like you never gave family hope, until you exposed your flaws. Showing a sickness that shouldn't be passed on.
We talk about the good ol’ days because we feel safer reminiscing about the life we wanted, rather than exposing we’re too scared to grow up and go for it. Once you Abuse hope, you avoid moving on to better because it's easier than admitting you gave up.
Nobody wants to quit what they exposed themselves to.
You have to be Half Man Half Amazing.
Fight through pain for pleasure. A man must run his world. And knows he'll struggle to finish without a good woman who loves, respects and nurtures his strengths and weaknesses.
Give the most to those who love you. The school of hard knocks means home is where love works, matters and pays the most.
That’s how Man, Woman and Family thrive. And do more than survive.
The percentage of people who are scared and unhappy is easy to calculate. Look at your figure. If you are fat-broke- broken- alone-happy in the madness or mean out of habit; your daily focus is on exposure to an unhealthy dream. It's also why you refuse to wake up and change.
No man can hide from life. Whether fully or ill-prepared, your fears and cares will be exposed.
Are you preparing to live out your dreams or nightmares?
Dad Joke
If you were born in September, it's pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a bang.
Music I'm Enjoying
Fairwell by Ransom & Dave East
I Love You by Ab-soul ft Faith Evans & JID
Movie I Recommend
American Fiction (starring Jeffrey Wright)
Books
NIGGER by Dick Gregory
Quote I'm feeling
"We don't just believe things because they are true. We think things are true because we believe them." Myron Golden
Be careful what you consistently expose yourself too!
To all the Father's wondering HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
THERA-PISSED
THERAPIST
Pissed off at life. Everyone feels like an enemy when you deny you're the result of what it’s become.
I try to remain calm. Tap into my Yogi spirit. Remove myself from the need for pain and pleasure. Then I remember, fathers are pained when we don't provide either. Some days we want to please ourselves, and that's when it always feels like family needs our help most.
A therapist will say, you're a loved and fortunate man to be able to provide for a family who loves you and also wants and needs your help.
That statement is true.
HOWEVER...That's not enough. We all want more-even if it's more of the same. As long as it's not more poverty and unnecessary struggle. The world always requires more of what families don't need. We can try to be minimalists, happy and satisfied with what we have, until it feels like a position of lack.
As a man you have to ask what am I lacking? The answer is usually the result of simple things you refuse to do, because you simply feel it's unnecessary for someone with your ego.
REALIST
We won't always feel happy. And feeling happy doesn't make life better.
Allowing and nurturing relationships. Allowing and nurturing love makes you happy and makes life better.
Doing things that make you productive, makes your dreams available and puts you in place to make it all real and believable.
Happiness comes with sacrifice. We don't realize we are sacrificing sadness, misery, disappointment and failure when we are real about the direction our life is going, how we arrived, how we're going to get out and work towards it.
OPTIMIST
The new drug word.
That Mindset is vitally important. A sign of the type of life you design and attract.
When things ain't going right, naturally you won't believe your star shines even with the darkest skin on the darkest nights.
When you grow up conditioned to low expectations, optimism feels like a treatable std you caught from that fine bitch with low confidence, who was letting errrbody beat and leave behind their damage.
You're supposed to think of more than your current predicament, because everything gets old. Without optimism- hard, bad times are the only ones that remain young and relevant.
WHAT THE FUCKIST
What do you do when you want to give up?
Remember you want to give your children positive successful places to look. And a quitter is a parent who lets the world raise bastards.
I say this everyday dreaming of a better everything.
As I work myself to exhaustion diagnosing nightmares. Helping people who fight and complain to keep the same life ending feeling-despite supportive friends and family.
Then I go home wrecked, like an overweight man in an over the hill tournament. Or a new divorcee prowling the club, thinking getting fucked up and dicked down keeps them young. Turning over regrets and woulda, coulda, shoulda's. Too mind and heartbroken to make it better then.
You know what the fuck is wrong. Sacrifice. Family needs. Regret. Struggle to do it different because nobody really gives a fuck about improvement. or fuck to take their mind off it.
When you get pissed. Recognize the clarity.
At your lowest, you find moments of hope, wishing for a hand to hold and pull you up, out of the fucks you're buried under.
You'll also have moments you wish to stay there.
And since you can wish, you can dream, and you will see what life is like having everything and everyone you need.
Music I'm Enjoying
Ransom & Dave East (Final Call Album)
Books I'm Reading
All The Lonely People (by Mike Gayle)
Dad Joke
"My favorite sex position is called 'WOW.' It's where I flip your MOM over."
To all the Father's wondering HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?
My advice is "Just don't pull out!"
WARNING
WARNING!
A-lot of days you can't help your kids. You won't know how-and most of the times you do, they will resist, and you will resent them.
They won't believe your plan is cool as their favorite failing celebrity.
Your struggle is just as real, but minor failures don't have mass appeal. Attention is now the definition of integrity and wisdom. It's the law ruling and ruining life. Thats how people live in misery and only become happy when they create ways for you to join them in gossip, arguments, disrespect and betrayal.
That's why the devil is scarier than God and the most worried about person in the bible is Judas.
Anger and resistance to a truth you don't want to hear doesn't make you a man and doesn't make it less true. Not allowing anger to be the reason you lose control of respect, and your dreams is how you become the adult you seek.
When children sink into that place of confusion, when everything feels wrong, they may not come to you or want anything to do with you and too much rejection can make you hateful. Not enough that you want to lose love forever, but enough to wish to be left alone long enough that it up-ends home.
Rejection feels like a hateful, violent crime. And whether you fight or flight, both are meant as payback.
WARNING!
It feels worse before it gets better, when we hold onto depression-purposely pressing down our joy. Ruminating on every bad moment so our mental workouts strengthen our self-destructive muscle, feeding it anger towards that wonderful inner child, until they give up on playing out the life that made them smile. Refusing to think or worry about consequences because they believe youth never dies.
Thats how dreams get buried.
Kids think being an underdog at home gives them a reason to leave it all behind. A reason to keep looking back for something they wish they had. Because the adult life ahead is not anything they ever prepared for, or not the version they wanted to move towards.
All THEY SEE...
No one to stand up for them because they took their adolescent stand against everyone with real love for them.
No one to cook for them.
No one to guide them.
No one to console them.
WHAT'S NEEDED...
Be that stubborn thing, always in the way. Awkward but comforting like a secret hideaway that fits whatever attitude they need. A rock that gets scraped and pushed but holds still, pain and faith.
WARNING!
Children won't believe they were taught to rebel by a loving father. To demand they stand up for themselves. Think for themselves. Be a good individual. Create a world of kindness and balance mean behavior on a scale that tips power and respect in their favor.
They won't believe-all they have to do is ask.
Fathers know better. We have to be the blessing they receive in their time of need.
Teach your children positive labels for themselves without being negative towards others.
Dad joke
Knock, knock.
(Who's there?)
Dozer.
(Dozer who?)
Dozer some great assets you got there.
Music I’m Enjoying
Song: Life is Beautiful by Larry June, 2 Chainz, & The Alchemist
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
The Book Of Five Rings
Book’s I’m Reading
(Textbook for my master's in clinical psychology)
To all the Father's wondering HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
TRAPPED
I don't remember where I heard "the more things change the more, they stay the same."
You ever think traps are personal brainwashing to?...
Crave severe negativity most of your life! Any reason or excuse for people to overlook that you're not living to your potential. It gives you a fire to run into. It's a hellish fight on a wonderful, wicked road that leads everywhere you thought about going.
The beauty is...It always leads to believing your life and goals reached the dead end you were hoping for.
Trapped In A Bad Mood
When you look around and feel trapped, it's because your ambitions got highjacked, taken over, held hostage by work that your anxiety says you to need so the family can eat. Relationships that hold you in place because you don't know if your next move will renew or ruin, because yours are scrutinized so much by people who are supposed to care, they ignore their own behavior or lash out when you give attention to theirs.
That trap makes fathers break out of a legal mentality. Break out of being rational. And we become that caged animal that once attracted but now scares you.
You ever try to help someone through something that's obviously bothering them, then they get pissed at you. Then when you don't help, they say no one pays attention. Then all of a sudden, they're happy and feel enlightened telling you about that same profound advice they received from another person.
You ever try to "Just Be and Think Positive?"
It makes you feel like you're going fucking crazy. Crazier than constantly thinking negative and feeling your life become the worst damaging, traumatic movie replaying in your head, until everyone you see, and encounter becomes an enemy.
This also happens when you watch and listen to negativity experts pretending, they are helping you find a way through the madness, while keeping you mad.
The terrifying thing about being trapped is how easily and often we do it to ourselves. You ever try to change and the people you want to lead keep setting up their life with the same sorrows. All you do is think about how much it's your fault. Somehow you stopped motivating them. And that makes you feel sorry for yourself.
We don't listen to practical wisdom.
We prefer to prove ourselves in areas that matter more to strangers' than family and ourselves. Then we all become strangers- trapped believing everything outside the family matters.
Breaking Free
Put your needs first. We hear it all the time "Be selfish!"
People who doubt the importance and positive impact of being selfish either don't understand power, or don't want any. Think about the power, influence, and success of your favorite normal-regular person (cool family member, friend, or boss) or celebrity (actor, musician, athlete). How the fuck do you think they achieved success?
Hint! They were selfish, put their needs first and stayed focused.
Start by saying what you want. One of the easiest, most consistent ways to trap ourselves it is silencing ourselves.
Leave anything that stops you from feeling good about doing what you enjoy.
Allow yourself to say it, act on it, then become it.
My Trap
I only want to be with my family. (That feels like freedom and power)
BUT
I spend so much time away from them working to make other people's lives better, I feel like I owe them more money than time. That makes me feel like a waste and too trapped with disappointment to look love in the face.
Quote of the fucking week
"Fuck shit mother fucker fucking stupid ass life and all this fucking hard motherfucking shit I gotta deal with, that I should be better than by now and have it all mother fucking figured the fuck out. muthat fucking wishing I could end all this shit but that would be the end of me, then I would really fuck up the family, what the fuck is wrong with me, what the fuck is wrong with everybody, and every-MUTHA-FUCKING THING IS BOOOOOOTHERING MEEEEEEE!" Fuck...
Dad Joke
I'm too serious to play. I don't have any time to waste except for on me and my struggles and complaints.
Books I'm Reading
Tests & Measurements for my stupid ass mother fucking psychology Masters degree class.
Music I'm listening to
Nas (A shuffle mix of all of his music)
To all the Father's wondering, "HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?"
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
PERMANENT INK
What have you written in blood?
Overcoming setbacks when disappointment makes you numb. When rage turns to resisting dreams, you wake up fighting for.
That's when you have to caress the life you want, so struggle doesn't leave you feeling fucked and suffocating like your being held down by everything and everyone, so your vision of a better life looks and feels like a friend instead of an enemy.
What did you write off, after setbacks made you believe you couldn't overcome? When quitting started to look like a job well done like stylish junkies telling stories of how they blazed trails you could only match if you got high on false hope.
Write your blessings out. Remind yourself of the new you-- when once upon a time, it was worth it to close your eyes and feel yourself buying your nana and mom a new house. And being the man your family would be proud of.
Take note of your mental. (What are you saying to and thinking about those you love and influence)
Damn son.
Why do you make it so difficult.
Did I hold your freedom hostage?
Was I wrong to give you everything you wanted and be there for your struggle and force my energy to match yours.
I know… I’m the adult. Sometimes being a parent feels like you never pay enough dues.
Ahhh… I get it. I remember that’s what it feels like for you.
Feeling cursed with a daughter even though I taught her right. Also to be independent and stand and fight for hers.
I did women wrong thinking that’s how men earn stripes. Hunting purrs and growls to mark them with ink used for protein and breeding. But as long as I came out on top!!!
Write on bodies and life you want to keep.
Don't wait until you're older and mature to touch up the hurt. Stories we forget we carry but our world notices.
Tough pain on display.
Stay at odds with failure. That makes frustration normal and success real unusual, like the one with the colorful hair, face tattoos and piercings holding your attention because you recognize scary freedom.
Let love and understanding be your art.
Fathers should be healing warriors like Jason Wilson.
A father’s attitude is the gun. Children’s action is the bullet. We influence their life’s usefulness.
To all the Father's wondering "HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?"
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
A father’s attitude is the gun. Children’s action is the bullet. We influence their life’s usefulness. (this is a quote I remixed--the original is by Jason Wilson)-check him out on https://youtu.be/2fBVdWRs62Q?si=wInyQODhqGx2iZlw
Let Your Kids Be Their Own Person
WELCOME TO THE FATHERHOOD EXPERIMENT!
This week is about letting your kids be themselves.
Hint... These are ways to let them suffer when they don't listen, then help them without the revenge mindset, all while gently showing them you won.
When you find out they did some dumb shit or rationalize a dumb decision (Start saying OK, smile, ask if they need anything, then calmly remove yourself from the situation)
I know this feels impossible. Especially if you were raised a certain way, and to believe certain things. When you try to control your children. You will lose more than your mind and their trust. Then your children will think you are impossible.
Let them be mad. Children need to understand what brings pleasure, and what type they prefer.
Let them deal with discipline. Accountability is the mindset leading to power. And power over your life, helps family own theirs.
Let them fight. Children need to understand the level of aggression they can tolerate.
Let them be wrong. Children will figure out the right decisions and way to live life. And they may want the opposite of yours.
Let them lose. Children should understand the desire to win. Along with the disciplined work and focus it takes to continue their pursuit.
Let them be hurt. At some point, everything will feel like an injury. Life will stun and shock until it all falls apart. Children need to realize it's the things they ignore that make it hard to gather and get back up.
Let them be disappointed. Everything won't go your child's way. We (Father's) can't rush in when that happens. Children need to analyze their decisions and make necessary corrections.
-Answer all of their questions, after you ask them what they think. We all need reminders that we are the creators of our dreams
Let them live life on their terms. Children make a new contract daily- according to their mentality.
Let them be the god that builds. Children need to learn to be a person of honor. That feels un-lawful in this world where people who do demon shit are judged as cool as long as it entertains you.
To let Your children be great, help them apply these rules every day.
Dad joke
What kind of bees make milk?
Boo-Bees.
Music I’m Enjoying
Song: I'm still listening to Happy Feeling by Frankie Beverly & MAZE
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
Book’s I’m Reading
(Textbook for my master's in clinical psychology)
To all the Father's wondering HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
Ol’ Head
I make it a point to watch what my kids watch. I understand the power of influence especially on young minds.
They watch a-lot of anime.
A-lot of the anime has great lessons in resilience, friendship and loving relationships.
My all-time favorite is NINJA SCROLL. I remember more action than sex, but the necessary amount of violence based on Ninja culture.
When I started watching what my children watch, all I saw was Big Tits, Ass, Camel Toes, Sculpted chests, Abs, Bulging Crotches, & boys who look like girls.
I don't remember seeing extreme sex, drugs, and violence everywhere in cartoons, when I was a kid except for movies with humans.
Remember Basic Instinct!!!!!!!! The Terminator, Porgies, Weird Science. American Psycho.
Cool World & Who Framed Roger Rabbit! (If men stopped paying attention to those type of women, they wouldn't suffer so many losses.)
Those movies are what remained in my memory rolodex for innocent sex motivation, until I became a parent.
Now as I'm watching my kid's anime(d) TCA (Tits, Crotch, & Ass) being thrown around like orgies are daily child's-play, I wonder how much influence it's having on childhood mental fuckery.
We used to have playboy and hustler, which were hidden and restricted. Now all you have to do is turn on the TV, visit a website, lie about your age, and WAP, all in your face. Dreamy, steamy, influencing scheming, pulsating crotches from adolescent entertainment.
I'm an 80's baby but I remember Fritz the Cat, Heavy Metal & Heavy Traffic.
Every generation has a new repeat of influential Sex, Love & Drugs. But nobody should be drugged to live obscene, especially children.
A-lot of the anime has great lessons in resilience, friendship and loving relationships.
As an adult, I understand the role of sex, love, drugs, and their utility and relation to violence. I also understand these are nothing to play with or take lighthearted around children. It shapes and molds them to believe everything harmful is somehow ok.
Now that I'm a parent, I understand how it shaped my own parents, and the people who helped raise me. Battered, used, abused, sexually frustrated and misled, so conversations about good healthy decisions were forced, one-sided, and angry.
Sex becomes our drug. Dugs become what we love until we learn to love ourselves.
Healing requires violent change because you have to fight against temptations that keep you addicted to ruin.
I must be getting old because I'm adjusting the truth. Like my parents and elders who conveniently forgot all the wild shit they used to watch, say, listen to & do. I haven't fully adapted to that mindset yet tho.
A-lot of the anime has great lessons in resilience, friendship and loving relationships.
I keep my understanding wise and truthful, with a sprinkle of old man youth. Like the old-school rap, Soul music and R&B they're getting hip to.
My family knows I'm here for them. We are all here because of my decisions. They had to live with mine. Now I live to help, influence, and encourage them to make thoughtful, good, useful decisions so they can live happily with theirs.
Old, Grown, Good Rule;
if you have to keep telling yourself you will stop or change something later or tomorrow-you are addicted.
To all the Father's wonder "HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS"
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out.
JOY & PAIN/ NEW BEGINNINGS
WELCOME TO THE FATHERHOOD EXPERIMENT!
This edition is regaining love in your relationship!
First let's talk about endings.
When is the relationship over?
Is it when you see your love start to do the things you did when you were unhappy?
Close Distancing
Same house different rooms. Asking for closure with confusing language because you're so mad & annoyed at everything, the only understanding your words allow is anger-because you want them to feel in danger.
Being mean on purpose like the asshole who tries to make everyone else be the piece of shit because he wont take responsibility for ANYTHING! Or, the bitch who tries to make everyone bend to her will.
I've never bent to anyone's will, except for my past temptation. I've outlasted & moved past them.
Giving in to anger in relationships influences those temptations to reach out & catch you slippin'. Makes your heart and spirit pound with hurt & damaging memories until you stop fighting for your love & begin fighting for its destruction.
Cliche "The hard thing is the right thing."
For parenting and loving relationships (in my case marriage)-this is always asking what's going on. Then taking the answer with love and responding in that imaginary, nearly impossible tone of always bringing love closer.
When family answers "NOTHING!" to make you seem paranoid & crazy- remain calm, remember to-say what you see. Beware... It may turn into a statement of blame.
"That's You Not Me!"
In loving relationships there is no just you or just me. It's You & Me. So, it's always We & US.
When love is allowed to separate; choosing sides of anyone other than home is the beginning of the end.
BEGIN
When you feel that anger & frustration that makes you want to isolate- push forward like the days you were first attracted & trying to get up in those draws, allowing nothing to be wrong, thinking everything was cute & unworthy of anger- even stinky farts. Now you're doing everything to cover up the stench of regret.
Begin by helping them see their importance & worth because the world & its work will make them see, feel, & want opposite of what their love is offering.
CAN YOU BEGIN LOVE AGAIN?
In a relationship where the feeling is ending, think about suffering. Its a strange request but you will naturally think about suffering less. Think who you want to suffer less with. I guarantee it's the family you have. Remember those moments & feelings of happiness.
Pleasure and suffering leave evidence. You choose which to build life and love on.
BEGIN Each day allowing yourself to fight for love.
Live each day being honest about what's making you sad & making you happy.
BEGIN With a happy ending to the day in mind & if you feel your love wake up different-Fuck until she changes hers!
The joy you get when you have courage to begin again is always better than pain of letting love end.
Dad Joke.
What’s the difference between light and hard?
It’s easier to fall asleep with a light on
Music I’m Enjoying:
Frankie Beverly & MAZE
I've listened to Happy Feelings (remastered version) every morning and every evening drive home since the new year began.
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
THE Bhagavad Gita
Book I’m Still Reading (I’m a writer so I’m studying these too)
NIGGER by Dick Gregory
To all the Fathers wondering "HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?"
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
SACRED LOVE
NEW YOU! SAME Ol’ Dark Times!
Trying to regain and keep the spark?
Sing the song of love.
Sometimes that involves hate-when you hold onto to things you need to let go. Father’s are the spirit of their family. That scary being used as a memory to frighten and encourage.
The god in you should always seek the god in your family.
Say good words to yourself, especially when you ain’t getting them from ones who need yours. Family seeks hate sometimes, when you haven't taught them to love themselves.
Nurture emotion. Plant ideas like a botanist. Discover what they desire to make good emotions bloom. Also, to create what they need because they can't live spoiled on what they want.
-Greed and impulse give people what they deserve. Sit your family down and analyze decisions, nerves and emotions to see the drawbacks and benefits. Look at how ya'll react in similar situations because old problems present new ways to steal attention.
Be too selfish to leave. Step away to get yourself right or get out of the way when you only find something wrong. Create a runway to a loving home instead of a path to get lost.
-Venting has to be two sided. Talk through the anger instead of holding grudges, or you'll get stuck looking at each other thinking stranger-danger & who the hell is this person & where is the one I love?
Cherish the nights of wolvish thoughts, when you would rather be alone. Leaders of the family are always under attack. Feeling like your best is never enough, and your worst is what they’ve been waiting for to use as an advantage.
-Show them more than pain to feel alive. Be cheesy and speak on the good times as they're happening. We're too quick to let happy feeling die. Chasing next time makes love run dry without crying.
Laugh more, even if you have to force it. Beware when you do. You may need to cry in silence to reveal what you thought you buried. And discover you carry tragedy like the pounds weighing you down because you never smile.
New year Song of Love
Keeping it new ain’t easy! The harder the better. (She said she likes a clever motherfucker!)
We love to pimp indifference.
Need to be a better richer man, so the kids never have to depend on another.
So, the miss remains a freak and keeps you-only- deep in those cheeks. Solve the mystery of making the old become new. Karma is a seductress and screws until you're stripped from relationships you cherish.
Can’t be a bystander when good love gets out of hand. Ain’t nothing rosy about pulling on heart strings full of startling, memories.
it's an everyday struggle, when love doesn't feel like enough because we never let it be more. Comparing it to before makes us an afterthought.
You thought saying I love you was enough!
That’s a thing that never was, like being honest when your body ain’t allowing those jeans so you take them off and tell me to come work you out.
I’m a little off in my head-needs a-lot of warmth, licks, strokes and caresses. Just don’t make it ache, cause we’re full of temptatioooon…. Won’t allow sin to be my sensatioooon… I’ll just fuck you right, so I don’t do wrong and let out my frustraaaatioooons!
I'll give you kindness if you give paaaatieeeence!
Dad Joke.
What's the difference between a hooker & a drug dealer?
The hooker can wash her crack & resell it.
Music I’m Enjoying:
Red Leather by Future & Metro Boomin ft J. Cole.
This Sunday by future & Metro Boomin
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
THE QURAN
Book I’m Reading (I’m a writer so I’m studying these too)
NIGGER by Dick Gregory
To all the Fathers wondering "HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?"
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
FABLES
Ever wonder how to stay good, in your soul? When you're exhausted. Working longer hours for those who think you're replaceable, than you spend at home, raising kids who are starting to resemble their mother more than manly ways you know they will need to provide and protect.
"If you're scared to take chances, you'll never have the answers."-Nas
Don't be entertained by the fables.
Fairy tales aint for men, we like real women. We make our life happen. We prefer women who trap us with positivity and look at setbacks as reminders of what we are working to accomplish.
This type of talk is considered explicit. I avoid bulIshit. I didn't swear in front of my children until the world tried to brainwash them.
You can be whatever you want... Until that version of you stops working-mostly because it doesn't align with your morals. If you have to force the fit, that ain't the style for you to live.
You have to be the alpha and the leader; Nope... It's enough to let silence talk. To step aside to see the choice someone wants. Loud, ruckus never makes a dedicated person change their mind. know where you stand so you don't follow someone to dead ends.
Sometimes Villains are the good guys. Your family may not always think so when you expose flaws they hide behind. So, they can't be the hero in their story of excuses.
Patience is a virtue... Only when you're not waiting for change.
Father's, teach your children to work harder on their dreams than slaving for pennies.
Being scared, safe, docile, and broke is the cost of failing your offspring. Moral ambition turns love back on. It gives us something to carry other than wishing we were different, and perhaps the hero on their present wish list. Your kids will see and appreciate pouring more into their life than the women you made plan b to avoid more responsibility.
Give your children something to aim for besides sex and drugs. The entertainment vice for aging addicts cozying up to everything that smokes, so they don't face lost hope and disgrace.
Father's... Give your family more than moments of excitement and forgiveness, from hugs, apologies or buying that thing you've been promising to hold their love hostage- so they believe they are more than a memory. That teaches them to be happy with the price a man sets on love.
Children need to know, their worth is determined by discipline and morals.
Dad Joke.
"Why do chickens wear underwear on their head? Because their pecker is on their face."
—u/Wellalrightman
Music I’m Enjoying
Song: "Rollin" by The Dungeon Family.
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
Book I’m still reading (I’m a writer so I’m studying this too)
NIGGER by DICK GREGORY
To all the Fathers wondering "HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS"? My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
THE GAMBLER
How Father’s Gamble Away Their Loves Savings.
Go play the slots in dark rooms full of strangers multiplying their misery. With each passing hour, lonely children and tired mothers, wishing, hoping and praying their love was enough to cash in their father’s time.
You believe family concern slows earnings.
Morning brings anxiety and reminders of wasted talent and life. You turn abusive to pretend you're not folding. The majority of moments are spent fixing how you see your children, because they spend their most vulnerable moments suffering. And someone has to own their predicament and costly decisions.
An irresponsible man needs to feel freedom from his own ruin.
It takes a poor, broken man to lie and deceive his family and never own up to his responsibility.
How to Hit the Jackpot.
Cash in when your children show you what they want. When they are asking you a ton of questions; play like you are trying to help them win instead of beating them away with aggravation.
Have the sense to know when to stop forcing your schemes on childish minds, eager to please and take everything you give.
A father’s happiness is what children think makes the family rich, especially when mom feels happy and loved, so home and family feel like it's something to be cherished.
Show them a man is rewarded from who and what he spends the most time on.
Go All In.
When you want to be left alone, take care of home first. Give family positive attention.
Give your lady a good hand, out of her clothes. Serve the cocktail pleasing to her lips, hips and spirit. Then go spend that time needed to improve yourself as a man.
Don’t bluff. Don’t hesitate. Play the game every way that sets your family straight.
Fathers know the value of stability. Sitting at the table, breaking daily bread with family.
Dad Joke.
Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack?
He only comes once a year.
Music I’m Enjoying
Jim Jones Song: Harlem
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
Book I’m Reading (I’m a writer so I’m studying these too)
NIGGER by Dick Gregory
To All The Father’s Wondering “HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS”? My advice is Just Don’t Pull Out!
THE TRAUMA REPORT
The Fatherhood Experiment's Weely Newsletter
SUBTLE WAYS TO HEAL TRAUMA BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR CHILD
Troubles and ignorance live on through your children. So spread truth rather than feelings.
SUBTLE WAYS TO HEAL TRAUMA BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR CHILD
When children fight to win a loser's game-chasing failure and expecting success-thinking and behaving as if their future is based on a gamble they never have to pay for.
Then... When every conversation, and every interaction feels like a fight to save your way of life.
Challenge them with empathy and gentle questions, instead of aggression.
What changes do they want and are they willing to make?
Did they get the results they wanted? or the results they accepted!
Don't give in!
When kids blame and argue-a resistance forcing you to feel like giving in because you're tired and they have the verbal energy of child touting their favorite swear words with friends, free to burn parents discipline with fiery tongues.
You have too much love and pride to be weakened, so you try silence, hoping the shit your child keeps repeating, finally leaves such a bad taste they will stop, shut up and possibly listen or even better-pay attention long enough to lessen the pain they keep putting themselves, and you through.
Stop Fighting the Help.
Children show us when they're struggling, then parents fight them for their own personal beliefs and needs instead of working to understand our children's and supporting them.
Trauma makes us all feel like we want something different. And someone to know we need help without broadcasting our pain or feeling like we are a burden causing more suffering.
We will always have trauma.
Here is how you heal and use it for your benefit.
Release blame; think of how im-perfect your childhood thoughts and behavior were, and the mistakes you believed your parents made. how many of those have you made?
Be Patient. Nobody has it all figured out.
Listen- to wants and pay attention to needs.
Stay willing-to give and receive.
Remain forgiving.
Apologize.
Keep your love healing.
Dad Joke.
Did you butt dial me?
I swear your booty is calling me.
Music I’m Enjoying
GNX album by Kendric Lamar
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
THE BHAGAVAD GITA
To all the Father's wondering "HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
IRRATIONAL
THE FATHERHOOD EXPERIMENT: A Newsletter for fathers
This week is about irrational thoughts and beliefs
Irrational beliefs can build or destroy families.
Do whatever it takes to keep your relationships solid without emotionally becoming a rock. Throwing your kids off because you want to get away and you want them too... Knock off the stupid shit that makes life stink. Everywhere they go, marking territories with lies and problems they blame on everyone else to solve them.
People wonder how a father can give advice to never have kids.
If that’s the only thing you get from our conversations, you already had doubts and just wanted someone, anyone to confirm your belief.
Fatherhood requires a selfishness everyone won't understand and ain't built for- because the self-less-ness it comes with feels like a whore's trap. A-lot of days you feel fucked and stuck, picking up the peace after your family keeps giving it up.
When your son makes you so mad you feel like it would be easier to punch him, hurt him, to do anything except console him, but you decided to be the exception and never make an enemy out of family especially your children. So, you hug him, show him you love him, care about him and more importantly respect him, because with all the loss in life you never want him to lose trust in your relationship.
It's hard being a parent because children believe they are better adults than those raising them. They try hard to break rules and put less effort into repairing damage. That attitude invests more means to an end and gives thoughts of abandon.
Sometimes You need to show them you are as foolish as they believe. Show them their behavior causes grief and nerves to break. They should see the beginnings of how the bad break down. Throw away all their toys and prized belongings-so they know the consequences of remaining broke, while pretending to be sorry. Mostly- they need to know you aint playing around.
The thought of burying them alive so they can be safe from the harm they cause seems like a great idea. Maybe they will find peace and come out less crazy and chaotic. Scared straight was never the plan, neither was turning on the hands providing what they haven't and at their age can’t.
Exhaust yourself to give them everything they want. It’s the version of love you were hooked on from the moment you went raw. Then remember, spoiled kids are worse than chlamydia.
Wish for them to have kids so they can experience the suffering they cause. Also wish for them not to because you think that revenge will fall back on you -and- spoiled grandchildren are as NaugThy By Nature would say "are the craziest." Plus, not being able to have kids can feel like Gods got something against you.
The exhaustion of thinking ahead to protect your children is the reason you are bald. But they think it’s because you’re old.
When your kids start thinking drugs and alcohol might be cool. Teach them that aging healthy is the drug that never gets old. That’s what they really want anyway-to escape youth, without being too old to seem or have fun.
Sit’em down and let’em have that taste.
Everyone needs to know the feeling of a life wasted. They already think they know the pool of despair- full of worries and cares for nothing that will matter after their trends end.
Life without health feels like addiction. And I don’t care what drugs are legal, no parent or child wants to care for a user and abuser.
Kick the habit of being nice.
If you’re mean, you will war, and rage against paid rent and happiness, because tension allows hate in the building. Similar to everyone choosing to remain ignorant, children think being nice makes you a fool, while they follow the trend of being taken advantage of to seem cool.
Thats why children need tough love. Show them you care, but you ain't carefree.
Be careful enough to discipline them and your own bias so you can get the best out of life while living.
Dad joke
What does a robot do after a one-night stand?
He nuts and bolts.
Music I’m Enjoying
Song: Commission by SHYNE
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
THE QURAN
Movie I Recommend
Life of Pi
To all the Fathers wondering "HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?"
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
PAIN POINTS
THE FATHERHOOD EXPERIMENT: A Newsletter for fathers
Pain makes you unrecognizable. It also makes you understand, and less agreeable because you know what it takes to make it through. It makes you take less from others and let more of your own go.
Don't hold onto more than you need. I'm old enough to know, nobody needs pain. We need healing.
Why is it that we can recognize, address, peacefully and calmly try to fix addict behavior in everyone except ourselves and our kids?
How scary is it that for a slight moment we would rather those traits be caused from drugs and alcohol, than laziness, bad habits, repeating mistakes, and lack of self-accountability!
You ever just think Jesus-fucking Christ, and feel like you fucked the wrong people to raise kids that don't seem to give a fuck about anything they do wrong because they just want to feel right? Then you think, what type of God dammed prayer did I screw up?
The pain everyone knows is there, but they ignore it, usually comes from focusing on outside influences that only bring negative ways of understanding yourself, and the truth, so negativity becomes the new normal.
What we need is to clear the air to see a necessary, positive reality. That only happens when we realize our pov isn't the only way to see and create.
Normal should be... Conversations where everyone can express their thoughts and opinions respectfully. Thats where it gets tricky because everyone's version of respect is different.
The right way to respect is to speak without an aggression aimed to hurt or humble. The simple way is to let you know I disagree; and I believe my opinion is right without making you feel wrong and wronged.
FORGIVENESS
One of the hardest things to do is forgive, because you have to think about what you did to contribute to the problem, and if all you care about is being right and forgiven, a sad angry life is all you will get. And you won't even be able to forgive yourself.
BLAME
Blame is too often used as motivation to keep yourself angry and keep the problem going. That's when forgiveness feels like being humbled, and like you're showing weakness.
Blame is useless because it holds you hostage.
Forgive, let go of the blame. Live a life that influences less pain and more healing.
Dad Joke.
What does a hot dog use for protection? Condoments.
Music I’m Enjoying
Hippie Sabotage-No Judgement.
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
THE QURAN
Book I’m Reading
Money Master The Game by Tony Robbins
Life
Eddie Murphy & Martin Lawrence
It's painful when you want to ease everyone-else's, but they want everyone to feel theirs!
To all the Father's wondering "HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?"
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!
THE FALL
Image from pinterest
THE FATHERHOOD EXPERIMENT: A Newsletter for fathers
Every year, every month, every season, every day, every hour, every minute, every second has a crunch time. When you work smart on the hard things, you won’t fall under the pressure.
You ever ask someone what their goals are, and they hesitate, give you a long-winded talk as you watch them mentally work through excuses of why they haven’t accomplished their goals yet. Or worse, they take offense and make it seem like you’re questioning their worth or intelligence?
That’s the veil or curtain falling. They are playing out failures in their head and why they fall short. And the truth they see is terrifying. They're reminded that they keep reaching for excuses and your question made them see it all clearly.
Father’s! This will be a struggle with your kids. Whether you are rich or poor.
First--- recognize the richness in being able to have conversations with your children.
Second--- the poor mentality and habits come from what has been allowed by you. Everyone fights to keep their comforts. When you become comfortable working hard on the wrong things you’re choosing to live hard.
What are those hard things?
Relationship struggles. If you’re lying or withholding the truth, your relationships will struggle. Nobody is always going to like to hear the truth, but they will respect it and you both will be better off. However, if you are telling the truth to purposely hurt someone, or to get yourself out of trouble, you will hurt yourself while destroying relationships.
Other hard things are, the usual---being fat, lazy, out of shape, eating junk food all the time, filling your house with junk food. Filling your mind with junk shows and information, while the only exercise you do is move your mouth to blame, complain and eat more- then wonder why you are unhealthy and sweat from the stress of deciding to keep yourself fat.
All your choice.
Back to working hard… When you work hard on the right things, being and making your loved ones happy become easier.
Earning your dream life also becomes easier.
I struggle to say you will always go through hard times because I believe those are just situations that come with working hard on the right things-like having to sweat to stay in shape. You will feel some hurt, and unwanted emotions. These are benefits of being honest and having good relationships.
What Are You Falling For?
Thinking tomorrow will be better, but are acting the same, doing the same, and believing the same negative things making you always want something better than the same dismal position you're in.
How can you think great, but believe failure? Because you haven't realized your actions help manifest your blessing. If you act out a belief long enough, that is all you see-so you might as well act in ways to improve your life.
I ain’t telling you nothing new. Just like all the advice you got from parents, relatives, friends, teachers and bosses who warned you about the same things.
It's similar to the region-beta paradox. (I call it the The paradox of the comfort zone;)
You'll jump (towards change/success) if you can still walk after vs you won't jump if you have to stay down for a while and feel like everyone will notice. This means most people would be better off in a terrible situation rather than a tolerable situation, because the tolerable situation allows a discomfort and failure you can mask as comfort, or even worse- resilience.
We all need people who don’t accept lazy, undisciplined behavior, who will help you, but also separate themselves if you continue to purposely fall because you don't fix your thoughts, and actions. This scenario should influence you to adjust and move towards ascension and success instead of falling for permanent failure. We also need to be that person in our own lives!
What you need to remember is that you are always hurt after a fall, whether you fall towards failure or success, (with the right mindset, one will lead to the other) Something in you changes. You walk different. Everyone sees. Dreams change. Belief changes. Life changes for the better.
You change. It all depends on which version of yourself you decide to fall for.
Don’t fall for easy money.
Don’t fall for easy pussy.
Don’t fall for easy work.
Don’t fall for the illusion of an easy life.
You have to make the hard choices to fall towards success and reach it- if that’s the life you desire
Don’t fall for easy relationships.
Also don’t fall for challenging relationships. If you have to work so hard to make other people happy or respect you that you're exhausted and don’t have time for yourself-you’re getting fucked out of your money, pussy, relationships, sanity, success, and being true to yourself.
Fuck That!
Dad Joke.
Why do women like Michael Vick
Because he kills it Doggystyle!
Music I’m Enjoying
OutKast-Claimin' True https://youtu.be/FSbNTNl0VhI?si=XCOHJZqY7tx-dfKP
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
THE QURAN
Book I’m Reading (I’m a writer so I’m studying these too)
Secrets of the Federal Reserve by Eustace Mullins
Movie I Recommend
Sugar Hill (1994, with Wesley Snipes)
To all the Father’s wondering “HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?”
My advice is Just don’t pull out!
Clip of the region-beta-paradox
BALANCIN-& BUDGETING A FATHERS LIFE
WELCOME TO THE FATHERHOOD EXPERIMENT NEWSLETTER
Rich Dad vs Poor Dad
Rich Dad vs Cool Dad
Which one are you?
For love or money, it's a man's duty to earn and provide both for his family.
This morning, I was reminded of something important. My son woke up and told me he loved me before I walked out the door.
I was grateful, we have reasons to live, but if you've been broke or poor you know more is necessary to keep bank accounts and families full.
Father's! You owe it to your children to handle your business. They don’t owe you for living. They didn’t bring themselves into the messy world you created.
Finances are Sexy
(Which is easier to discuss, finances or sex?)
They both are about creating, believing and understanding your worth
Talking about sex can be easy. As a father- at some point you figure women out.
I told my kids-"babies come from a penis doing pushups inside a vagina until it throws up."
My wife said “what the fuck!”
Was I wrong? Fuck NO!
I also told my daughter not to wear skirts or dresses to movie theaters or on dates while she was young. Because boys finger fuck and sniff to predict if it's a hit or miss.
Daughters should take their time. Rushing is what fools and whores do, and they always end up being taken advantage of.
I also told my sons to take their time.
The only oats boys need to worry about are cooked on a stove. Spooning too many females drains their primal focus-an important ingredient for men not to become suckers and jokes.
Porn, although awkward is also fairly easy to discuss. Don't embarrass them. it's natural to be curious.
What's hard-(No pause needed, or pun intended)- is screwing finances without pleasure for your entire life. Now that I think about it, it has to be easier than I thought because I kept doing it. That happens when you don't weigh your options.
So here we are. Learning to budget finances, along with emotions.
The psychology surrounding money keeps fathers acting like broke-minded athletes who can't wait to leave pussy smoking. Hustling backwards, paying the highest price to be dope.
Learn to earn.
It starts off feeling like a burden because labor is your initial worth.
The oldest and best scheme is believing you can get rich quick. That’s like saying Kobe only became great by simply copying how Jordan played. You don’t see the fails, struggles, airballs as a rookie, working through injury, doubt, depression when the world that once cheered, turned against him. Extra strength training. Extra studying. Extra practices. The courage to be disliked-using hard work to correct what he did wrong, making it easy to do it right—then doing it all over again, every day, consistently makes less focused and lazy people an enemy.
That gives the confidence to believe you deserve to earn what your worth.
Pay close attention to who and what gets yours.
Money is the woman you always wanted. If you don't pay attention to how she's handled, she'll slide any grip you had to another man.
Believe your worth more than your doubts.
When your children doubt you without testing a theory other than disagreeing, it's because they don't see any sign that you understand money. They're scared of going against proof that you have zero clue about creating and financing a successful future for yourself or them. They're scared to be the type of wrong they see you are.
Discuss what you did wrong. Show them you own your mistakes and actually correct them.
They say mistakes don't make the man but if you keep yourself ignorant by refusing to correct them, you remain broke on purpose. (Make that make sense)
Also, don’t judge for the same mistakes you made when trying to profit. You know where they learned it! Guide them to see the difference between poor habits (banking on negativity and emotional spending-buying what you feel you need). And rich habits of paying for what creates and sustains knowledge and profits.
Don’t Ignore facts, and truth unless you desire to raise poor disciples.
A father may not get the trust if he's not rich. Thats when he has to make moves like riches are the person, he's trying to make regret breaking his heart.
A father becomes a rich man by building trust in himself through understanding the cost of being undisciplined.
A father becomes cool when he executes his plans to make himself and family whole.
I’ve lived a life of being inconsistent with my goals and struggled until my 40’s. Now I’m a thriving writer and work hard helping teens, adults, and veterans who sacrificed everything for the country, government, state, and city that fights to keep them sick. The people who can’t afford healthy insurance (Yeah, you read that right-think about it)-and I’m one of them. Like I already said, I’m budgeting my finances, health, and sanity.
Compound Good Memories.
Cut options and opportunities allowing you to enjoy and excuse laziness, through body, money, and mind-illness.
I remember when my daughter was 5 and we were at the park, pretending to sail across the world on the playgrounds ship. She said “Daddy if you want to be happy, always do the right thing”
She’s 20 now.
Kids sense when something’s wrong and I was unhappy because I was too broke to be spending time at the park, having fun with my angel. Sadness becomes a father's God when he can't enjoy precious moments. And instead of listening to her back then I continued acting like I was immune to sin.
The worst moral sin a father can commit is having childish finances as a grown man, so your child has to depend on another hand and the government.
Intention
Empower your family.
Remember to empower yourself.
Learn the value of credit. It's your social and financial allowance. Gained through hard, honest, smart work. And if you are dishonest, you better own the hurt. A good reputation will keep you on the inside track so you can be the first to know where and how to profit.
Move with all intentions on honest progress. This seems like a no brainer, but if it was, we wouldn’t be stuck celebrating things that keep us fucked.
Focusing on sex when you are young leads to investing in the wrong person and robs the energy to achieve your dreams.
Dad Joke.
What did the man say to the asshole kid, who didn’t want to listen and said, I don’t need to listen to you! You ain’t my dad?
He said-That’s right, I’m your motherfucker.
Music I’m Enjoying
Killer Mike (Michael)
Books I’m Studying
The Kabbalah
MONEY-MASTER THE GAME (TONY ROBBINS)
Movie I Recommend
Coming To America (1988 with Eddie Murphy)
Podcasts for Fathers about Finance and Improvement
Market Mondays (by Earn Your Leisure)
Wall Street Trapper
The Come-Up Series
High Level Conversations (by 19 Keys)
The Budgetnista
HOW BOYS GET LOST & FATHERS FIND THEM
Image from the warriors movie
THE FATHERHOOD EXPERIMENT: A Newsletter for fathers
Boys get lost when...
They see truth as an attack. Change routines for a day and believe it ends bad habits.
They seek unhealthy influence because they didn't have proof that good one's win.
Actions up to now represent your DNA lineage, after a certain age you choose pain or suffering.
Fathers!
They need knowledge promoting critical thinking, better outlets and messaging. That doesn’t happen when you deny the history of your decisions.
Boys get lost when...
Therapy becomes violence and a main substance to lessen the pain their consuming. Some choose natural remedies. Some nurture separation from reality and family.
We all pick and choose who and what to listen to. The ignorant ones are loudest because they make trouble look cool.
Boys get lost when...
The preferred voice tells them to struggle hard, to father themselves and gain wisdom from a school ruled by law breakers. They know 2 wrongs don’t make it right but take the right to ruin a life and live on dead ends.
Armed with ammunition to change. But forcing a way through, wounding yourself to prove a point. Lessons don’t need to be written in blood or broken trust. After it spills ain’t the time to have a conversation. Pay back respect before you owe condolences.
Boys get lost & Fathers find them when...
Fighting to protect and preserve a dream that hasn’t come true yet. Belief turns to doubt because they haven’t achieved dream results. That starts a new beginning or end -depending on which truth you abandon-it forces you to hold onto something greater. A guide, A god, A Father, Yourself- A creator of beneficial thinking and behavior.
Benefits shouldn’t come back with negative interest. Do what means keeping your dreams, your life, and your dream life in your hands without surrendering prayer.
Fathers!
You are the arrow. Your love is the bow of sympathy, empathy compassion, and strength. Children are the target. Remember your similar struggle! Don’t allow those memories to haunt the spirit of the child staring back at you.
The son will test you. They don’t realize that’s an automatic failure. A Father must rule with respect, patience and a force that makes children see, understand, face and sometimes avoid the potential outcomes they welcome. The result will never be as easy as the thought.
It’s not always a good feeling. It reminds me of many ass whoopings I got as a child, so I grew up fighting to build a kind, gentle, peaceful identity. Thats why I would rather force my children to think than take a beating.
Fathers!
Be there to provide, protect, and love unconditionally- which is hard when children put us in hateful positions. Remind them that doesn't make us a threat.
To my Sons! To my Daughter! Our love is the solution even when you're the problem!
Dad Joke.
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? She gagged.
Music I’m Enjoying
OUTKAST--Their song 13th Floor/Growing Old is in the heaviest rotation.
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
THE QURAN
Book I’m Reading (I’m a writer so I’m studying these too)
THE 50th LAW (50 Cent & Robert Greene)
Movie I Recommend
The Boy and The Beast (2015) by Mamoru Hosoda.
For all the Father’s wondering “HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?”
My advice is Just Don’t Pull out!
FIRST 48
Image from Pinterest
THE FATHERHOOD EXPERIMENT: A Newsletter for fathers
Are you serious enough to love when they don't want your version. When it hurts to give and receive theirs. Sometimes the smile cuts like a knife. Daggers on both sides. A Fathers sense and humor has to carve out loyalty.
First 48...
SECONDS AFTER AN ARGUMENT
Feel the sadness. Feel the violence.
Remember when your child didn’t listen to warnings not to play with danger- until the pain of their cries stung and made you flinch like stitches. They fell, split their lip and SCREAMED. You pop them in it as punishment-part of healing your anger. As the prophet of injury, you hope the pop shocks them quiet and seals their lip shut, like it never happened.
You wish you were a magician, so you could turn back the belligerence that transforms idiots. But sometimes smart people behave dumb, it's how they test. After they disappear to their room, it’s calm for a minute, now that their face is out of reach and off limits.
Those emotions are brutal, you feel battered. You have love available, also some hate stewing like an upset stomach. The shit parents never think they would have to deal with.
Focus On What Needs To Improve
The house turned chaotic because you only focused on problems. The solution is like keeping your kitchen clean. Wash as you go instead of letting the dirt sit and pile up. What's cooking might be good and bring y'all together, but nobody wants to eat in filth. It makes it all unenjoyable.
HOURS AFTER AN ARGUMENT
Waiting for another. Recovered and ready for slick comebacks, parents usually don't have the energy to think of. Children on the other hand, are never slight with hacks.
Look at discipline like a movie. What is allowable parental aggression? What do you want your child to see, feel, and hear.
Silence, pops, flicks, plucks, smacks, yells, spanks, grounding without pounding is a fathers UFC. (unless it's the mother of your seed). U Fucking Care. At some point kids love to hit you with the I dare you to, and try to make you prove how much you don’t.
What they really want is the YOU, before the first 48 wardened your humor. Before they felt like a prisoner not allowed to express themselves. Before they felt hostage to a prowling overprotective, out of shape, afraid of fun parent, always on the lookout for damage.
Fathers want the same. The problem is trying to tame the wild. The younger you. The version you locked away.
Pay attention to the lesson your child's trying to express. They may not have the words but are loud and clear with emotion and action.
Focus On Current Happiness
It's about what's happening NOW. You can't change what happened then, but if that's your only focus, it will happen again. It's how we carry trauma.
THE NEXT 4 TO 8 DAYS…
The house should be different. The way it should’ve been at first. Parent to child, better lead with respect. No longer fixing energy to show how life would be without each other. (I remember wishing as a child that I had different parents).
Feel the love. Pray and wish you never feel anymore neglect. Now for the next, focus on that happiness. Love while young. Love while mature, most importantly fathers need to make it apparent.
Dad Joke.
"Knock Knock.
Whos there?
Radio.
Radio who?
Radio- not- I'm gonna cum in your mouth. " (Chuck Palahniuk, Knock Knock)
Music I’m Enjoying
Chaos is My Ladder (Ransom)
Book’s I’m Studying (The Holy Ones)
THE BIBLE
THE QURAN
Book I’m Reading (I’m a writer so I’m studying these too)
MAKE SOMETHING UP by Chuck Palahniuk
To all the Father's wondering "HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?"
My advice is Just Don't Pull Out!